it takes practice and moxie
One of the most common questions and reactions I receive when I support people in speaking up to create more equitable, inclusive, compassionate, and just spaces is the fear of doing it "wrong."
What if I make someone uncomfortable?
What if I cause offense?
What if the person doesn't know or understand what I mean?
Maybe you can relate.
I was reminded of this in a training I did today on integrating cultural skills into mental health care.
Most of the people who share these hesitations aren't coming from a place of indifference. They aren't avoiding the topics or staying quiet because others' experiences are insignificant to them.
They're coming from a place of caring deeply, not feeling confident in their skills of what to say and how to say it, and not wanting to risk causing unintentional harm.
However, there are a couple shortcomings of allowing the fear of getting it "wrong" to steer your efforts.
Neglecting to speak up, uplift the voices of others, and empower action that creates change can both cause damage and prevent deeper connections.
It's okay to be imperfect in the applications of intentional care, learning, and effort...AND you can repair!
As I remind my daughter, you aren't expected to start off great at something. (This is hard for her. Just yesterday she cried that she is "terrible" at math...just because she learned a classmate scored better on a test!) 🥺
No matter what the skill, intentional practice leads to improvement - and there's no shame in having trouble with something that you haven't learned and practiced.
If you hold yourself to a standard of perfection and certainty before trying something different, you trap yourself in a prison of your own making. And, trust me, prisons are not a healthy place to be - literally or figuratively.
This work around speaking up is aligned with my coach's, Alexia Vernon, and is one part of why I was so honored to join her #Moxielicious podcast. In episode 508, I discuss compassion fatigue, burnout, and the importance of developing cultural awareness, knowledge, and skill for socially conscious leaders. I also speak about the sobering statistics between experiencing injustice and the odds developing a medical condition.
You can listen to our conversation here. If you prefer to listen on Apple podcasts, here is that link.
When you're looking to show up for yourself and others, advocate for social justice, and protect your wellbeing...
whether as a socially conscious leader, mental or healthcare practitioner, or DEIB professional, or an involved member in your community...
you need and deserve safe spaces to grow, make mistakes, and practice with new skills that can BOTH support your advocacy work AND nurture your wellbeing.
You matter. You do make a difference. And, I'm so thankful you're here.
