to love and be loved 💞
Where were you two and a half years ago as the pandemic bore down on the world? Do you remember the instant your world changed?
I remember the day when my area closed down. I had been working in my office, seeing clients in person, and anticipating when and how things might shift. When I heard things were closing for an expected two weeks (how naive!!!) I packed up all my things - my desktop computer, credit card machine, Tibetan singing bowl, planner, etc. - and loaded them into my car. It felt so surreal.
In addition, I used the extra time I wasn't commuting and established two new habits that make a tremendous difference in how I function and feel even through the challenges of today.
1) Yoga. I decided to try yoga for the first time ever. Having no natural flexibility, I'd always been reluctant though intrigued by all the accounts and research showing benefits of this type of practice. With You Tube and the power of free videos in my own home, I was quickly hooked. Whether 7 minutes or 58 minutes (most often 18-22 minutes, to be honest!) I have enjoyed it most days since...and definitely notice when I miss a day in how my whole body feels.
2) Gratitude app. I began using an app to organize and support a daily gratitude and affirmation practice. It's silly, but the fact that it shows me how many days in a row I've written gives me that extra motivation on evenings when I'm tired and tempted to just "get to it tomorrow." I'm now at 168 days since the last time I missed a day. Even on the days I expect it to be hardest, I'm surprised how many things I feel grateful for, and the more I've done it, the easier and more natural it's become.
When people ask me how I'm doing given my dad's death, the state of the world, or the intensity of my work, I can honestly answer that I'm well. Not perfect, not always happy, not always the same moment to moment. But inside, I'm well because I can feel all the other feelings without overwhelm. I can surf the waves and observe what is in and around me. I can chart my course through the storms.
There's been a lot of reflection in the past couple months. As I shared this in my dad's memorial service, and then in a recent email with a friend, I realized how much I wanted to share it with you, too. Of course I'm biased ;) but I do believe it holds a very simple and important truth.
At the beginning of this year, my dad made a journal entry. He knew his health was declining and was feeling more effects of his illness, though we didn't know how fast the next 5 months would deteriorate.
When you get to the end of your life, you are given the gift of becoming aware of what is most important, most special in one's life and you take nothing for granted anymore. Our lives on this earth are finite, and when that truth comes home to rest your vision opens, your heart opens, your mind ponders, and you just want to love and be loved and for me, I know that I do and I am.
~Michael J. Eldredge, emphasis added
As we witness the suffering in one another and the world around us with clarity and compassion, may we continue to stay rooted in this purpose - to love and be loved.
What would help you to love and be loved today?
(This isn't rhetorical, I'd really love to know - if you're willing to share, please reply to me directly. I'm the only one who monitors this email and I'll see it personally.)
You matter. You can make a difference. I'm so thankful you're here.
