Are you feeling calm, safe, and connected right now?

You've heard the metaphor about the oxygen mask, right? 

Here’s the quick synopsis:

At the very beginning of every flight, part of the safety procedures instruct that you make sure you put on your OWN oxygen mask before trying to assist others.

And, in theory, we can probably agree. 

Yes, it makes sense that you can’t continue to help others if you can no longer breathe due to your own lack of oxygen supply.  

Yet, every day, we try to do as much as possible before running out of air, and we don't always make it back in time.  We try to help everyone else around us before we pause to put on our own oxygen masks.

We feel so deeply for our children, our loved ones, and the injustices in the world, that we try to do more and more, telling ourselves that we are selfish if we slow down.  

Here’s one, simple, 3-minute tool to put on your own oxygen mask.

Of course, 3 minutes is not usually going to be enough to get you through a week, or even a day, with the levels of stress that are bombarding our nervous systems constantly.  

It is simply a step in the right direction.  Because really, we can’t just put on an oxygen mask for a few minutes and then take it off again to run around the plane assisting others. 

We need to either keep it on or keep returning to it frequently - with it reliably accessible.

And that is why I’m so thankful you’re here.  As a psychologist with a focus on cultural sensitivity, my whole approach is about helping you keep an oxygen mask on (or instantly available) so that you can be the healthiest version of you - both for yourself, and for the benefit you bring to the world around you.  

And the one ESSENTIAL step to showing up for others and being ready to really make an impact on the issues of social justice, human rights, equity, and inclusion that you care about so deeply is to help your nervous system return, again and again, to our ventral vagal state.  

What’s ventral vagal?

Ventral vagal is the state in which we can use all our most advanced, ethical, moral, highest-order thinking, communicating, reasoning, and problem-solving skills. 

The state in which we feel calm, safe, and connected. 

The state in which we can think clearly and act consciously.

Pretty hard to make a difference if we aren't in that state, right?

I'm captivated by just how essential this is, and how to help you work with your nervous system so you can work against systemic injustices and prejudice.

For now, though, check in with your metaphorical oxygen levels.  And if you’re not feeling calm, safe, and connected right now, it may be a good time to try out that 3-minute bell practice again!  (You can find it to download again HERE for video and HERE for audio only.).

You matter.  You can make a difference.  I’m so thankful you’re here.